First thought/note to self: I really need to start writing more often because every time I sit down to post a blog I feel overwhelmed by how much I have experienced...
Current location: Java Coffee shop-aka free wireless-day 3...this blog has taken me longer than I'd like to admit-but I'm finally getting to it...also due to lack of fast internet I wasn't able to upload all of the pictures that I wanted but please visit:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2494631&id=14229274&l=9d3c91efd6
to see all the wonderful people i've come encountered!
So it's been a few days since my last post and I wish I could throw each and everyone of you into the experiences that I have been going through-I think that would be the only for you to really understand exactly what I've seen...
Ok, so every Saturday there is a 2 hour community yoga class at Sarakasi (where I work)-all of the instructors are supposed to attend and anyone else is welcome to join. I would like to note that this was the first yoga class I have attended since the states (I've practiced, just not in an organized manner) so I was a bit nervous before class. The energy in the room was flowing while Moses guided us through the poses. Using various phrases like "the past does not exist," "where are you-if you are not here you are nowhere," "focus on your strength not your weaknesses" etc. I was able to keep up with the class-the class was intense in more ways than one-physically challenging and mentally cleansing, after 2 hours I was feeling pretty good. Practicing with everyone for the first time felt really good-I mean my entire time with AYP up to that point had just been interviewing the instructors, so to finally see them in their own element was pretty amazing. This may sound a bit weird, but practicing yoga together forms a unique bond-it's something about sweating and pushing yourself through different poses and going through the same thing that brings everyone to another level of understanding. Savasana was the best part of class-Moses had us pair up with partners and then he talked us through quite a relaxing/hands on final relaxation. We were pushing down on shoulders, walking up and down each others backs, applying pressure to certain muscles, and pretty much giving each other a "yogi" massage-it felt incredible...
After class everyone went across the street to a "hotel" aka a restaurant-and we had lunch. My lunch consisted of Skuma (kale) and chipati (similar to a tortilla) which was delicious! Every Saturday after class there is a free lunch available-usually it is an Indian vegetarian spread, but this week we went to a nearby restaurant. Following lunch I headed home, had a shower and then Kristina and Emily came over. We sat and chatted over a bottle of wine and then went to an Indian restaurant within walking distance of my place. YUMMMMM-Indian food has become quite a comfort food for me, and I must say the chicken tikki masala and garlic naan really hit the spot. Similar to the last meal I had with these 2, good company, good conversation, and AMAZING food made for a wonderful evening.
Sunday: The morning started out at the Maasai market at Yaya-the craftsmanship put into everything the people were selling blew my mind. Paintings, leather goods, jewelry, purses, shoes, wooden sculptures, key chains, literally anything you could possibly imagine was available at this market...and it was all hand made.
After strolling through the market for a bit we headed to Kibera (the largest slum in Nairobi) for another market. The Toi Market is a HUGE 2nd hand market that was quite an experience. A pathway winding through the market was a disaster-mud lined the stalls and a various rivers of water streamed through the center...no cars would even imagine passing through there. Each stall sold something different-women's clothing, under garments, sheets, curtains, baby clothes, jeans, sneakers, hiking shoes, you name it and it was there. The unique part of it all was that all of the stuff being sold is clearly from donation-everything is 2nd hand and brands were from the US and Europe...we sifted through some stuff but it felt weird to even think of buying something from here-even though it was super cheap and some of the stuff was cute-the stuff is there for people from Kibera and Nairobi, not for girls from the US who are looking for a good deal...
We eventually made our way to The Children of Kibera Foundation Girl's Club-every Sunday a girls club is sponsored for students from Red Rose School in Kibera (also where liz worked). This past Sunday was focused on teaching the girls how to bake cakes...and teach them some yoga. First off-most of the homes in the slums do not have ovens and so the lesson focused on teaching the girls how to bake a cake using charcoal instead...
These pictures don't capture the amount of life these girls were radiating. Amidst a life of chaos, crime, poverty, and mayhem, these girls were so happy to put all of that aside and hang with us for the day. It was so inspiring to spend a day with these girls...the power and energy I felt from them is indescribable. They are some of the happiest and most appreciative youths I have ever met and their love of life and learning was like something out of a movie.
Leaving the girls was probably the hardest-they were pulling, hugging, and clinging to any sort of affection from me. I felt sad, needed, and happy that I had made such an impact in such a short time, but it was time to leave. I couldn't help but promise to return the next week and I have found myself really looking forward to it! So, Sunday I will be heading back to Kibera for an afternoon with the girls again!
Ok, so back to AYP...
Since we've started conducting the interviews of the instructors we've really gotten to know some of them and they are just as curious about us as we are about them...our conversations are now more of a dialogue...instead of us just asking them a ton of questions they're now asking us more. Thinking about it, it makes sense-why wouldn't they be interested in how we got into yoga and how we ended up in Kenya, what our lives are like in the US, how many siblings we have, etc. Needless to say, getting to know one another has resulted in some of the most intense conversations I have ever had. Conversations about religion, poverty, and politics are reoccurring and lead to some heated debates and are really making me thing-I love it.
One question I have been faced with more than once is: do you think yoga is a religion and if not, how do you convince others that it isn't? Initial answer: NO WAY...but after multiple times of trying to defend it and make a point, it kind of does start to sound like a religion and I can see how other people see it that way. I still firmly believe that it is NOT a religion but a way of life...people in Africa are used to having people/charities/aid coming into their countries and preaching religions and so when people come and start teaching yoga and saying it is a way to feel better and create a new lifestyle-obviously their automatic reaction is to resist it and assume it is a religion. Yoga is a way of life: it transforms and changes people in different ways, but it is definitely a good addition to anyone and everyone's life...
After a week in Kenya, I'm really starting to get a grasp on how yoga has changed these people's lives...for me to completely relay the impact is impossible but bare with me as I try to put it in writing...
"I would buy ganja and sell it to make the money. But with yoga I found using my hands and my mental mind I don’t need to buy ganja and sell. Now I do yoga and get money-so its like something that has changed and improved”
"Yoga is about giving and receiving...yoga is it, it is about one love, one unity, one connection for everybody."
"I want people to see me as a changed man...not the man I was before-I want to give back to the community what Paige and Baron have given me...hope. There is always hope and the community needs to look into the future and not get stuck."
Survival of the fittest-people in the slums will do anything to make money. Stealing, hustling, gambling...you name it-they've done it...Yoga has provided these instructors with an out-they no longer have to do all of these illegal things because yoga has given them the opportunity to change their lives, to be good. This is where it starts to sound a bit preachy, but since I've been through the same teacher training that all of these instructors have, I get it...transform your life and you can transform others...it is a contagious way of life if people let you in. I see it in all of these instructors-they're all wiser than words and in age younger than me. They have lived a million lives more than I will ever live and yet they tell me "you're in inspiration for us." Excuse me...when they tell me that I don't even know how to respond-here these people are living in some of the worst conditions in the world, trying to change their communities telling me I'm an inspiration...lies-with 1 week under my belt, the amount of inspiration I have received is immeasurable. The way they strive for a better way of life is hands down the most inspiring thing I've ever felt.
I'd like to share one specific story that really brought up some intense emotions. We interviewed one of the female instructors (I'm not going to mention names for privacy reasons) but her story left both Emily and I on the verge of tears...what was your life like before yoga?
"I was not that good in books-like reading books and school, but in sports I would normally become the best. I was on a futball team and I was the youngest kind in the group. I was only 13 and the others were 19-24 and there was a huge difference. I wanted to play soccer but this group was not showing direction in life. I was about to start using drugs and they all did those like cocaine, injections, like all of those. I found I was always lying...to my mom like I was supposed to be home at 6 and I wouldn't come home until like 9:30 and I would tell her I had practice but our practice always ended around 4. It came to be a big issue of which my parents started knowing it and they started to say no. I found my group mates wanted to give me a boyfriend a I did not know what to do...I was like 'yes, no, yes, no, no, no, yes...' and I was just not sure. I was only 14. One day I was about to be raped...and those girls from my team arranged a group of 6 men who wanted to rape me. I was even locked in a room and I screamed and screamed...the neighbor heard me and he called all the other neighbors. I was even naked-this boy had torn my clothes off and they were ready to rape me and as the first person came towards me the door opened and the neighbors came. They were all caught and the police came and I was ok."
Her choice of words and the fact that her voice didn't crack once was amazing. She really lives by the idea that "the past does not exist." This is just something that has happened and she has moved on and become a strong and powerful woman. During the story both Emily and I teared up and at one point I almost lost it; her confidence in telling the story paired with the honesty was so real and left me with so many emotions-it was a sensory overload. Her attitude about the situation snapped me out of any tinge of sadness-something about her confidence and power to overcome such a traumatic experience was contagious and inspiring.
One thing that's really opened up for me with all of this is the idea that these stories are no longer in the books or news for me. I've read countless articles and books laying out life in places like Africa, South East Asia, India...etc. but nothing can even come close to the emotions that arose from sitting in front of someone who has lived through it. And to see someone pull through such occurrences really makes me appreciate where I come from and the life I've been so lucky to have lived thus far.
Yesterday I ventured to Kangemi (one of the slums) to hang out with a bunch of the boys who are acrobats and yoga instructors. Brian picked me up at Westlands and escorted me via matatu to where they live. First thing: I stupidly asked if he still lived with his parents and then he very nicely explained that he never met his father and his mother passed away when he was younger...WOW I am an idiot-lesson learned...he further explained that his cousins, Walter and James (2 other instructors) are like brothers to him and they all live together at the same compound. To understand how these boys have influenced their community is impossible unless you walk through the streets of Kangemi with them. While walking to their compound we ran into SO many people he knew...he was constantly high fiving people in the streets and he would introduce me to them-most of them were their yoga students-amazing.
Their house/compound is indescribable...muddy walkways, just wide enough for 1 person, are the only way to access their place. Once we entered their compound I was instantly greeted by their grandfather-"Mambo!" and I gave him a quick hand shake and we continued through the narrow alley where we encountered Walter and James' mother next-she was beautiful...she asked me how I've been enjoying Kenya and told me that next time I would have to stay longer so she could cook for me-everyone I have met so far has been SO accommodating and welcoming-it is quite inspiring. We continued walking and ran right into Walter's room which was located next to Brian's. Tin roofs, wooden doors, single rooms, un-even floors, sharing a bathroom/kitchen area with multiple families-this is all the norm for them...and yet they are some of the most appreciative/happy people I have ever met.
My main motive for going was to watch them practice their acrobatics but it turned into a bit more than that...first I got to see where they lived and then I actually participated in some of their practices...
The place where they practice used to be a big open green area, but unfortunately the government has started digging a sewage/drainage system and their space has decreased significantly. The session began with a jump rope session-they told me to line up and just follow the person in front of me....UM okkkk-so the line started to jump into the jump rope and they were all counting...you had 2 counts to make it through the swinging rope. Great. It has probably been close to 10 years since I've jumped into a swinging jump rope, and I was pretty nervous. The first time I ran into the swinging rope, yelped a bit, but surprisingly came out without hitting the rope. After 2 or 3 times I actually started to feel comfortable and relaxed a bit...thennn they started doing tricks while jumping rope and that was my que to pull out of the line and play photographer.
The talent that was displayed beats that of acrobats I've seen in the states. Flips through the jump rope, hopping in high push up position, juggling while jump roping, hand stands here, human towers there...ya know, a normal afternoon with friends.
**pictures**
Unfortunately it started to rain after only an hour and we ran to a nearby primary school for shelter. The school was a tin building with no electricity, a tiny chalk board, and close to no desk space...
Once the rain passed we made our way back to Walter's place where we hung out, watched some tv, listened to some reggae, had some tea and a snack, and chatted. It was such a good time and I'm so glad I decided to go.
Kariobangi…this was probably one of the most overwhelming/intense/eye-opening experiences I have EVER had. The morning started with Moses sending us off on a matatu-Emily and I made the mistake of forgetting to ask Moses the name of the stop we were supposed to get off, so we were riding blindly into the day. We eventually got off at the main stage at Kariobangi and we stuck out so badly. We were THE only white people in the area standing on the corner waiting for Patrick to come meet us. After a few phone calls and some confusion, he finally found us!
We followed him to the social hall where he was teaching a yoga class. The space was surprisingly much better than I had anticipated…the class began around 10:30 and started with 2 women and their daughters. The class eventually grew to 4 women, 1 man, and 3 little girls. His words guided them through a pretty intense practice but they were strong…we later learned that these women were his regulars and have committed to attending yoga classes. Distractions during the class included children crying, walking around, climbing on their mothers, and attempting to escape the room, but the students remained focused throughout the entire class. This was the most inspiring part-despite the challenges of space, childcare, and transportation, the students stayed committed to the practice and performed amazingly.
After the class we walked to a small fruit stand where Patrick bought the ladies a snack before they began their journey home. He told us that many of them come from far away and so he usually buys them a snack and provides them with transportation fares. One of his students is over 50, has 10 healthy children, and comes to class almost every week even though she lives over an hour away-that is dedication…
So our next stop was to Patrick and Catherine’s house. Catherine just gave birth to Tully last week-and wow was the baby little! We walked up 4 flights of stairs to their apartment in Kariobangi to find a tiny little baby girl wrapped up and sleeping soundly on the bed and Catherine hanging out. Catherine and Patrick met at the level 1 in Mombasa with Baron, and since then they’ve started a family!
Their place was overwhelming-and that might be an understatement…a tiny room maybe 10x10 with a full size bed, a crib, a small kerosene heater, speakers playing reggae, and some small bins storing rice, ugali mix, and beans. Culture shock: this was their home. There was no tv, no bathroom, no sink, no kitchen…nothing. Here was this brand new yogi family living a life I could never even have imagined. But their happiness and attitude towards life was inspiring. They were proud and excited to have us see their home…they showed us pictures of their families, their acrobatic groups, and their yoga accomplishments-the amount of life in that small room was thriving. The part that really warms my soul is when Patrick asked us to take a lot of pictures for them because they didn’t have a camera…they have this beautiful newborn baby and they had no way of showing her to the world. I was so happy to play photographer and snap away-they are such a beautiful new family and I am so glad I could help them out…
I have to admit, I almost couldn’t handle the situation. Patrick was heating water over the kerosene heater for his SHOWER!! A small baby was lying on the bed completely wrapped up, and we were just there. I’m still unsure as to how to process the whole experience, but it really opened up my eyes. Articles I’ve read have become so real for me since being in Kenya. It’s so easy to picture different places in your mind, but there is nothing like really being exposed to it. After we left and returned home I had a break down…from the story about the rape to seeing the house in Kariobangi, I just couldn’t handle it. I was skyping with my mom and while explaining everything to her I just broke down in tears. There’s no way I can fully describe the situations to you, but the impact it has had on me in such a short time is what I want you to realize. I couldn’t make any of this up and crying was my only out…I don’t want to feel bad because these people don’t want sympathy, but I honestly have no idea how else to express what I’m feeling. It’s sad, frustrating, overwhelming, exhausting, and leaves me feeling useless at times. My mom sent me a quick message saying, “Don’t carry the world on your shoulders! We all do our best to change the world but it is not easy or simple.” This is so true but its just so hard because I feel like any contribution I make isn’t as significant as it could be-but that is neither here nor there-I mean I am in Kenya…
So after an emotionally exhausting few days filled with processing that experience, I’m finally feeling better today! (By the way, this blog post has taken me like 4 days to post-my apologies!)
So this morning I went to a yoga class in a park…Walter and Azi were the main instructors, but it was really interesting because they incorporated some of the newer instructors in the class. So Walter began the class, Azi taught a sequence, then Brian, Sadick, and Francis each taught different sequences then Walter wrapped up the class. I find it so amazing to see this because it shows that Azi and Walter have really taken on a leadership role…they’re helping the other instructors by allowing them to teach parts of the class-Walter told me that they’re really trying to get them to feel more comfortable teaching adults because most of their classes are to children, and this is such a great way to do so. Seeing them helping one another is such an inspiration-it is just another thing to add to the list…they’ve got the whole yoga mentality down and they’re clearly in it to transform their communities and each other.
The class was hard, long, and left me feeling pretty good-at the end of class some people shared how we felt and I made a point to let them know how amazing it was that they worked together to teach the class. With changing instructors that frequently it is easy for a class to lose its flow, but it really worked for them…they have the system down and there wasn’t a disconnect at all.
“open your chest for the breath, open your heart for love, and open your hand to receive help” Francis was the last to share and his words left me with chills-here is this person, younger than me, spewing out these words of wisdom. I am so thankful that I am getting this exposure-I know I cannot fully understand the impact these people are having on me right now, but I know I will carry this experience with me for the rest of my life.
Ok I’m finally caught up…but I would like to write a bit about my living situation. When I first found out that Paige wasn’t going to be in Nairobi for the first 2 weeks of my time in Kenya I was a bit nervous…but there was need for that initial feeling. Billy and Billy have been awesome roommates. I’m starting to feel like their little sister-each evening we hang out, catch up on the day, and eat dinner together. We listen to music, watch tv, watch movies, have intense discussions about the world, and I’ve just really been enjoying getting to know them. As much of a culture shock living in Kenya has been, they’ve really helped me process a lot of what I’ve been going through with discussions and I’m thankful that they’re so open to listening to me and my experiences!
DONE-promises of a post sooner than later-and as always if you can, please donate to my fundraiser for AYP! Now that I’ve documented some of my experiences and shared them with you, I hope you can get an idea of how much fundraising helps…Namaste!
https://www.z2systems.com/np/clients/ayoga/campaign.jsp?campaign=7
Oh and Paige, we're looking forward to your return! :)
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